The New New

I was mulling over a conversation that took place a few months ago (ish?) between April, Shine, and moi. We were discussing relationships and how excited one can reasonably get when interacting with a new Special Someone. April, always optimistic and encouraging, felt that effort and proper behavior (on the part of New) were to be celebrated and enjoyed. Shine was of the mindset that people will utilize short cuts when provided to them, and thus it is perfectly natural to question one's sincerity in certain aspects of wooing. I, dear readers, fell somewhere in the middle.

While I do think there is a lot to be said for embracing the happiness that is staring you in the face, no questions asked, I do also tread lightly when it comes to sharing my life with someone new. This doesn't have anything to do with my past nightmares relationships, per se, but I am definitely an analytical kinda girl, and love/romance/twitterpattedness don't get a free pass just because it makes me feel nice. (Like, really nice, but still...)

So, given my penchant for overanalyzing EVERYTHING, I was thinking about new relationships last night/this morning, and I realize there is a very dangerous-slash-wonderful period when you start seeing someone new. (I mean really seeing someone. Dating, really.)

You see, when you first start dating someone who shows promise (which, if he/she doesn't show promise, what the H are you doing?), there is inevitably a period of sheer awesomeness. Especially if you've been single for a while (hypothetically), you will likely come up with dozens of fun activities that you can do as a couple, all of which will seem exponentially greater because you haven't been able to partake in said activities (as a couple) in however long. (Kind of like a "grass is greener..." situation.) Anywho, you and New New will find your calendars chock full o' dinner dates, concerts, social outings, sporting events, etc. that will leave you feeling nothing short of blissful, convincing you that this is what you've been waiting for for years (er, months, weeks, whatever...hypothetical).

You tie all these feelings to the New New, and suddenly you're day dreaming about doing dishes together in your adorably cozy home, laughing at some adorably sweet inside joke y'all share, and falling asleep on the couch, snuggled up in his arms, watching your favorite film.

Hypothetically.

But pump the breaks, kids. This is when shit will inevitably get real. And not because I'm bitter and think every relationship is doomed to fail. But because, well, it just does (get real, not fail...necessarily).

After a while, you get past the glorious Best Dates Ever period (if for no other reason than you've exhausted your arsenal of ideas crafted while you were single), and things settle down a bit. This isn't a downhill motion, necessarily, nor it is the beginning of the end. It's simply the start of something else. And, harsh reality be damned, this is usually when the real stuff begins to take seed. You're going to have bad days, collectively and individually. And when this first hits, it's going to suck. You're going to think it's over and that the magic is gone, never to return.

And it may.

But if you're lucky and you're willing to stick it out, you may be on your road to finally having a partner with whom to share your bad days...or at least sit next to as you work through it all yourself.

Hypothetically.